The Nets and Heat tip off tonight in Miami, and it’s fun to play the game of “Who’s it less painful to root for: Pat Riley or Vince Carter?” Tough call, really; we tend to veer toward cutting Vince Carter some slack, if just because the guy clearly knows how to have a good time.

We don’t mean to say that people aren’t as excited about this series as they are the other three, but … well, tickets in East Rutherford are still available.

Here’s a look at the series from around the Web:

• Daily Quickien six.
• YAYSports!: Nets in seven.
• The Association: Heat in five.
• J.E. Skeets: Nets in seven.
• Complete Sports: Heat in seven.
• Chris Sheridan: Nets in seven.
• True Hoop: Heat in seven.
• Deadspin: Heat in six. Even though Gary Payton is the only point guard we know more tired and washed up than Jason Kidd, we have a feeling the Nets, deep down, kind of stink.

Your predictions in the comments, if you can work yourselves up to it on a Monday.

I tried to avoid doing this after all the confusion regarding these playoff tiebreakers , but I can't help myself:

Tomorow's games:
Bulls vs. Toronto
Washington at Detroit (i.e. the Tony Delk show)
Indiana vs. Orlando

If Bulls win(Bulls guaranteed higher seed than Milwaukee):

• AND Washington wins AND Indiana wins:
  • Washington is 42-40, Bulls/Indiana are tied at 41-41
  • Indiana wins tiebreaker (division record)
  • Bulls are the 7th seed
• Washington loses, Indiana wins:
  • Bulls/Indiana/Washington are tied at 41-41
  • Bulls win tiebreaker (highest winning percentage in games among the 3 teams)
  • Bulls are 5th seed
• Washington loses, Indiana loses:
  • Bulls/Washington are tied at 41-41, Indiana is at 40-42
  • Bulls win tiebreaker (head-to-head versus Washington)
  • Bulls are 5th seed

If Bulls lose(Bulls guaranteed lower seed than Washington):

• Indiana loses
  • Bulls/Indiana/Milwaukee are tied at 40-42
  • Bulls lose tiebreaker (lowest division record)
  • Bulls are 8th seed
  • I cry myself to sleep
• Indiana wins
  • Indiana at 41-41, Bulls/Milwaukee tied at 40-42
  • Bulls lose tiebreaker (lower division record)
  • Bulls are 8th seed
  • I cry myself to sleep

Feel free to check my work, the real wrinkle was the Bulls being 3-1 against Washington during the season, which set them apart from Indiana (who split their games against the Bulls and Washington) and Washington.

 I'd say the most likely situation is the first, with everyone winning and the Bulls earning the 7th seed.

And if I needed to remind everyone:
5th seed - face Cleveland
7th seed - face Miami
8th seed - face Detroit, I cry myself to sleep.

HowEVA (© Stephen A. Smith)… right behind them, we have the Orlando Darkos, probably the best team of the group. They’re mathematically alive, but barely. At the moment, they’re three games out of a spot with three to play, despite their current 7-game winning streak that includes wins against maybe the best five teams in the NBA, the Spurs, Pistons, Mavericks, Suns, and Heat. The Darko trade has been great for them (no, seriously), and they’ve got a bright young line-up with Dwight Howard, Jameer Nelson, and of course, Darko. This is probably the last time in a while that they’re not going to be in the playoffs.

Key games remaining:

Sixers @ Magic, Tonight.
Bucks @ Wizards, Tuesday.
Magic @ Pacers, Wednesday.
Bulls @ Magic, Monday.

Now I may not be able to wax poetic about the days of Dave Bing and Bob Lanier (I'll leave that to the gen before me), but I can spin a yarn or two over the Bad Boys, circa 1988-1990. But rather than listen to me preach, I'll let the below list of quotes — and one famous poster shot — begin to tell the tale of the baddest of the Bad. [And please note: as usual, I'm showing a considerable bias towards #40, Bill Laimbeer. But Detroit Bad Boys would be forever grateful for any additional memories/stories/links/etc. that you could provide on any Piston player or era that you hold near and dear. We all share a common love for the Boys in Blue; therefore, if you feel so moved, hit us up in the comments section.]

Without further ado, enjoy.

Henry Schulman, sportswriter, "If you laid Bill Laimbeer, Dennis Rodman, and the rest of the Detroit Pistons end to end in the Mojave Desert, it would be a good idea to leave them there."

Bob Costas and Pat Riley, covering a game with the Pistons, at halftime had this exchange:
Bob Costas: "Well, one look at our Cheap Shot Scoreboard shows the Pistons up 8-1. Rodman is having a fine half with five, and Laimbeer is running second with two. What do you think, Pat?"
Pat Riley: "Well, every time Chicago has the ball, five Pistons are committing fouls. It's as if to say, 'Well, the officials can only call one at a time, so we get away with four.' You know, Michael Jordan said before the game, 'People want to push this kind of basketball out.' The Bulls are 24 minutes away from doing just that."

Former Laker, Kurt Rambis, on Laimbeer: "I assume his parents like him. But you'd have to verify that."

Former Utah Jazz GM, Frank Layden, on Charles Barkley: "I would gladly chip in and pay part of his fines every time he smacks Bill Laimbeer."

Sportswriter Tim Sullivan, writing about the NBA moving the Finals to pay-per-view: "The NBA Finals is worth about $10 per game unless it involves Michael Jordan ($20) or Bill Laimbeer ($2)."

Sportswriter Jan Hubbard: "Detroit center Bill Laimbeer was considering seeking an injuction against the Olympic selection process because he was deprived of a chance to make the team. Laimbeer said that as a tax-paying citizen, he should have had the opportunity to try out for the team. It would have been great if he could have tried out for the team, because then he would have been excluded on merit rather than logic."

Ted Davis, longtime announcer for the Milwaukee Bucks, on Laimbeer: "Dirtiest player: Bill Laimbeer. The dirtiest of the dirty. Actually tried to hurt his opponent. Actually tried to hurt his teammates in practice. Was WWF before WWF was cool."

Davis, again: "Set the best screens: Two. Laimbeer would hit you with elbows and knees. Rick Mahorn, the size of a Winnebago."

Legendary Piston coach, Chuck Daly, on Laimbeer."He would drive people insane and then just walk away. He was like Gandhi."

We've posted this one before, but it merits repeating:

Letter from Charles Barkley to Bill Laimbeer, I think in 1989:
Dear Bill,
F*ck You.
Charles

Quotes above are courtesy of:
Basketball quotes [Block 37]
Bucks' voice Davis has seen it all [Milwaukee Journal Sentinel]
NBA Daily Humor
Charles Barkley Quotes, 6.0 [Clintcam]

Previously on Detroit Bad Boys:
Keep your hands off my hair-band